Sunday, October 14, 2001

twenty two

i wish i had something important to say right now. the fact that i don't makes me feel like a loser. oh and last night, it was funny, i was sitting in a friend's room and a group of people were talking and then all of a sudden, i was overwhelmed with a sense of what a loser i am. this wasnt' a depressing realization, nor was it previously unknown. but it was overwhelming, and i just felt like such a dork. but like i said, it wasn't a bad thing, because i expressed it and was validated. so i guess that was a good thing. i had such a fun weekend with everyone! who--hoo. it was so promising to see something new happen with two people, fun to meet new people, cool to hang out with them, validating to be there. ah, validation is such a good feeling, youknow ? think about it... to say something, do something, express a feeling, idea, view, belief... and then to have that validated, for someone to say 'yeah that's okay' or even 'yeah that's right' or 'no, you're not nuts for saying/doing/thinking/feeling that' feels good. i think that is one of the things that people want in order to feel loved and accepted. that said, eh i forgot what i was going to say. i'm currently being interrogated about my weekend, and i don't like it. anyway, eh if i ever have something with merit to say, i'll try to hurry and write it down so i sound like i am a person of substance.

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