Vending Machine Purchases Gone Bad

So I skip breakfast this morning, sacrificing my bowl of Grape Nuts and glass of V8 for 10 minutes on the internet. DAMMIT.  Seeing as how my level of cheapness went from $12 bottle of Aveda shampoo to $0.99 bottle of Sassoon… let’s just say I was a little uneasy going to the vending machine.

 

I blame my year-old career in Purchasing, but I’m as cheap as it gets now.

 

::: Thinking to myself :::  “Now why would I buy a 20 oz. pop from the vending machine for $1.10 when I can buy, like, 6 cans of pop from the store for the same price?!”  Of course, I do realize this is the ultimate in cheapness, it’s like, JUST PAY THE DAMN DOLLAR AND GET A SODA FOR GOD’S SAKE!   It’s not as if I am totally cheap – I will still drop pretty pennies on clothes, vacations, shoes, purses, books, music, etc.  It’s just this random, doesn’t-make-any-sense cheapness about commodities that I’ve recently developed.

 

Anyway, so at this point, I’ve mentally committed to my Vending Machine Purchase. I was having lunch with a supplier today anyway, so what’s a little bit of coin in the machine going to do, I “saved” money by not going out to lunch.

 

So, first mistake – in my attempt to get a Diet Coke, I somehow end up with Coke Zero VANILLA.  You’ve got to be kidding me, people.  WHO INVENTED THIS, and WHERE DO THEY LIVE?!  I’m saying this in a bad way, as Coke Zero Vanilla is a bad, bad idea. Like, Barry Manilow plastic surgery bad.  ::: Shudder :::  (See: Perez Hilton)

 

You’d think my bad luck ended there. You are, and always will be, wrong.

 

Next stop: food machine.  So much to choose from… who knew they had Chocolate Payday?!  And why didn’t you tell me sooner?  And Lorna Doone.  Excuse me for sounding like an old lady, but DAAAAYUM those are good.   (Open Note to Lorna Doone people:  A little redo of your packaging would go a lonnnng way.)

 

So, foregoing the sugary sweet treats that looked so tempting, but not wanting to negate my hour of cardio yesterday, I opt for a healthier treat.  Like maybe some baked Cheetos.  Or Salsa Sun Ships.  Or Caribou Granola Bar!  OH THE CHOICES!!

 

So, I decide to go for the baked Cheetos.  Can’t go wrong there. 

 

Well, maybe you can go wrong, let’s say, by pushing B2 instead of B4.  

 

Now, not only do I have to endure Coke Zero Vanilla, I also have the joy of eating, nay, wasting UNSALTED TRAIL MIX.  Worst $1.85 I ever spent!

 

P.S. Quite possibly, one of the worst blogs ever posted, yes I’m well aware, but also out of the blogging-loop.

CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: This email contains information from the sender that may be confidential, legally privileged, proprietary or otherwise protected from disclosure. This email is intended for use only by the person or entity to whom it is addressed. If you are not the intended recipient, any use, disclosure, copying, distribution, printing, or any action taken in reliance on the contents of this email, is strictly prohibited. If you received this email in error, please contact the sending party by replying in an email to the sender, delete the email from your computer system and destroy any paper copies of the printed email.